- Person: Rape is just surprise sex.
- Me: Killing you would just be giving you a surprise nap.
- Me: ...forever
My fetishes include men giving me large sums of money and then never, ever talking to me again
(Source: bewilderedsapling)
(Source: bb-forever)
the only reason i wear all black is so i can absorb the energy from the sun and become the most powerful being on the earth
I’m the type of person who looks at the menu for five minutes but ends up ordering the same exact thing every time
(Source: theyellowbrickroad)